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A threesome is usually a sexual fantasy on everyone’s mind. It’s hot, it’s naughty, and you can do it with two women and a man or two men and a woman or three women or three men—endless combinations. But really, you customize this fantasy to match your sexual preferences, on top of that, you get double the fun—if you know the best threesome sex positions to indulge in.
But, this also means, you’re going to have to know how to handle two people.
Now, if they’re experienced, don’t wouldn’t worry so much, they’ll teach you the ropes. But, of course, it’s always nice to do some light research and have an idea of what’s going to happen.
Threesome sex positions you need to know
So, it’s time you knew what the best threesome positions are. Now, if this is the first time for all of you, be prepared to have some laughs and stumble along the way trying to figure things out, but it’s completely normal.
With some time, you are going to figure out which positions suit you best. Though, if you have trouble figuring it out, use one of these positions. They work every time.
Threesome with two men
If you’re a woman and having sex with two men, we’ve handpicked the best ones that will keep all three of you happy! [Read: Max MMF pleasure – How to have sex with two men without a messy tangle]
1. Double penetration
It’s one of the classic positions for a threesome with two men and a woman. Essentially, double penetration is when one man enters the woman vaginally while the other enters anally.
To make this as easy as possible, start with one man lying on their back on the bed, the woman should go into cowgirl position and then the second guy can enter from behind as if it’s doggy style. [Read: 10 ways to master the devil’s threesome]
2. Effiel Tower
This is a terrible name, but it’s another position that works out pretty well. To get into this position, the woman starts by giving a blowjob to one of the guys. Sounds easy and it is.
But while that’s happening, the other guy penetrates from behind *you can all decide whether it’ll be vaginally or anally*. It gets the name the Eiffel Tower, well, because it looks like the Eiffel Tower from the side. So creative, right? [Read: Blow job queen – 13 titillating moves to give the best head ever]
3. Spit Roast
What a name. If you’re the woman, don’t take this name offensively. You’re not going to feel like a spit roast.
So, to get into this position, one guy lays back on the bed while the woman gives him a blowjob. The other guy is going to come from behind and penetrate her, doggy style. The thrusts from the guy doing doggy style are going to make her blowjobs more intense, thus, getting more of the shaft sucked.
4. Missionary
So, the woman and one guy are going to get into the missionary position, the traditional sex position that we all lost our virginity to.
Now, here’s the twist. While that’s happening, the other guy is going to come up kneeling by the woman’s head where she’s going to orally pleasure him. So, everyone’s getting a little somethin’-somethin’.
Threesome with two women
In this scenario, if one of you is a man and two of you are women, here are the threesome sex positions that’ll ensure all three of you have a huge orgasm by the end of it all. [Read: The MFF threesome and 20 dos and don’ts you should never ignore]
5. Dual ride
This one is everyone’s go-to threesome position when there are two women. It’s an easy position, so if this is your first time, start with this one.
One woman is going to sit on the man’s face while the other rides him, cowgirl, or reverse cowgirl. So, everyone’s happy. It won’t require too much effort for anyone and you get maximum pleasure.
6. Sail away
This one is a little naughtier. What happens is that the man penetrates one woman with her legs over her shoulders. The other woman will be sitting on your face for oral sex.
Now the woman receives oral sex and the man can kiss, however, it may not be comfortable. But, give it a try and see what works for you guys. [Read: Threesome tips – What to know before entering one]
7. Magic O
This one is great if both women have good chemistry together and are sexually attracted to each other. One woman will be laying on her back while the other woman lays on top of her. They can make out, finger each other, and explore each other’s bodies.
Then the man enters the woman who’s on top, from behind. So, he’ll be performing doggy style while they’re getting it on. It’s very hot.
8. Double oral
This is when the man just gets to sit back and relax while both women give him oral sex. It’s a great way to allow him to have a quick break if he’s tired and both women will be able to give him a blowjob while making out.
The women take turns giving a blowjob or do it together, whatever works best. [Read: How to give good head – The biggest guide and 50+ blowjob secrets and tips]
9. Daisy chain
Oh, the daisy chain. This one is another easy threesome position that’ll work out great if you all love and are good at oral sex. Essentially, you three are all going to be laying on your side, in the shape of a circle.
The man will be giving oral sex to a woman, she’ll be giving oral sex to the other woman, etc. It’s like the circle of life, except better. You get to *hopefully* orgasm and you’re naked.
10. MFF
Some women are not comfortable going down on other women, so if this is the case, then don’t do this position.
However, if they’re willing, one woman can go down on the other woman, while the man enters her from behind, doggy style. You can switch it up so that everyone gets oral sex and a little doggy-style action.
[Read: The threesome invite and how to make the amazing happen]
Lesbian threesome sex positions
Besides FFM and MMF threesome sex positions, there is more to know for lesbians. So, let’s look at some lesbian FFF threesome sex positions.
11. The Sunday morning
In this lesbian sex position, two women lie side by side on the bed. They need to be close to one of the edges. One woman stands over the other two and surveys the naked women.
Then, she uses one hand on each of the other ones and teases their breasts, exploring the curves on their body. Finally, she penetrates both of them either with a dildo or her fingers. The ultimate goal is to try to get both of the women to orgasm together. [Read: Lesbian love – what it is really like to date a woman]
12. The scissor sisters
For this threesome sex position, you will be rubbing pussies together and gripping each other with your legs. You want to be in a sexy entanglement. One woman gets to watch as the others do the playing.
She can direct the other two with her hands while playing with all the body parts she wants to. She can also masturbate as she watches, use her hands to add pressure and penetrate the others if she so desires.
13. The daisy chain
This is a classic position for either threesomes or group sex. It’s similar to the 69 position, but the spacing between people is better. There are three bodies joined from mouth to pussy.
Each woman uses one of the other lover’s thighs for a pillow while they do some tongue teasing. Then, you should open your legs to the next lover to keep it going. [Read: The lesbian fantasy and what it means to have one as a straight woman]
14. Sleeping beauties
This is simply a “spooning-for-three” sex position. It gives all three women a full-body experience.
It allows all of the lovers to enjoy the whole naked body of each woman on both sides of her. Feel free to have roaming hands are much as you want.
15. Rub-a-dub-dub in a tub
This is a perfect threesome sex position for lesbians. You need to get in a hot tub with jets. Then, the bubbling jets and hot water will give you floatation and add to the sensuality of the experience.
So, you form a circle of three women, then relax, and face inward in a triangle. You can kiss, touch, and have your hands wander everywhere.
You could start this one with bathing suits on and then let the hot tub gradually remove itself, revealing breasts and tempting all people involved.
16. The rocking chair
For this threesome sex position, two women will sit with their knees up and their feet on the floor. Leave a few feet in between.
One woman lays down between both of them on her back. Then, she should spread her legs with her face up between one woman’s legs.
After that, she should lick and suck as much as she wants. She can also use her hands to pleasure the woman behind her. The one at her feet can use her hands to touch the middle lover’s pussy using a toy or her fingers. [Read: Lesbian death bed – what it is and how to bring the oomph back]
17. Queen for a day
One woman has to be the dominant one, or the “queen” at the moment. Then, she commands attention from the other two by standing like royalty. She should have her feet apart with her knees slightly bent. Then, the other lovers – or “slaves” – kneel at her feet to show their devotion to her with their tongues.
The point of this is to have two mouths on one pussy, which can be an amazing feeling. Also, the two “slaves” can be French kissing as they rotate between the queen and themselves.
Gay men threesome sex positions
Now that we know some FFM, MMF, and FFF threesome sex positions, now let’s look at some MMM ones. [Read: How to tell if a guy is gay – 13 subtle signs to hone your “gaydar”]
18. The twerk train
This starts with a dancing – or twerking – marathon. Three men stand straight up and form a chain.
The one in the middle gets a dick in his ass while he’s putting his into the man in front of him. You can keep switching off positions so that you all have a chance to be the lucky guy in the middle.
19. The circle jerk
With this sexual position, you will all gather in a circle, unzip your dicks, and take them all out. It’s partially a game of show and tell, and partially masturbation.
Then, you can take turns getting each other off with your hands as well. The goal is to all try to have orgasms together.
20. Who’s the boss
For this position, one guy has to play the dominant role and give orders to the other ones. The “alpha male” will command his “slaves” to do whatever he wants them to do. They could kneel on either side of his cock and lick it to their hearts’ desires.
Or he could ask them to suck each other off while he watches like a voyeur. Meanwhile, he could spank or “punish” anyone he wants to, whenever he wants. [Read: Does liking a man mean I’m gay? No, but these signs might]
21. The bridge
You need three men standing, and the middle man will be giving and receiving the action. First, he should bend over at a 90-degree angle. Then, he should take one of the guy’s dicks into his mouth while the other one puts his dick in his. Both men on the sides get to watch it all.
22. Kneel before the throne
One guy should be sitting on a chair, and another one should be on his lap. Then, a guy on his knees can alternate with dick sucking. Or, the guy on top can put his butt on the dick underneath him while getting his sucked by the other one.
23. Doggie with a bone
To begin this one, there have to be two of the men on all fours on the ground or the bed – doggie style. The guy in the back is giving it his all, and the third man stands facing the one in the middle, and he gets it in his butt and his mouth.
24. Man sandwich
For this last threesome sex position for gay men, one partner should be on his back. Then the man in the middle should climb on and straddle him and let his dick go into him. The third partner can straddle the middle guy while facing him.
[Read: The triad relationship – 33 honest questions, facts and benefits]
Now that you know the best threesome positions for any sexual preference, we don’t know why you’re still here. What are you waiting for? Get that threesome into action! Oh, and make sure you use protection.
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Vinod Srinivas SeraiVIN SERAI
Vin Serai is the founder of LovePanky.com, and has delved deep into the working of love and relationships for almost two decades. Having dipped his feet in almo…
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Free Use Relationship: What It Is, Signs To Know If It’s Right For You & Tips To Do It Right!
By MIKKA PADILLA
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If a free-use relationship is your kind of spicy, buckle up! We’re diving into the do’s, don’ts, and emotional rollercoasters of everything you need to know.
If you’ve been intrigued by the buzz surrounding free-use relationships, you’re not alone. This unique arrangement isn’t just about sexual chemistry; it’s an exploration of trust, boundaries, and open communication.
So, if you’ve been curious to learn how this all works, we’ve got you covered—from setting ground rules to the do’s and don’ts that will make even seasoned relationship pros nod in approval.
[Read: Couples kink list – 52 freaky and weird sexual fetishes many people indulge in]
What is a Free Use Relationship, Anyway?
Hold the phone—1.5 million members on the r/freeuse Reddit community? Yup, you read that right. Free-use relationships have piqued the curiosity of many, but what exactly are we talking about when we say “free use?”
In a free-use relationship, one partner grants the other the freedom to engage in sexual activities without the need for explicit, moment-to-moment consent. Think of it as a sexual all-access pass, but—and this is a big “but”—it’s built on a foundation of mutual agreement and boundaries. [Read: 36 sizzling sex life secrets to spice up your bedroom and leave you horny 24/7]
In your average relationship, sexual encounters often start with a ritual—you know, the do-you-wanna-have-sex guessing game, followed by subtle—or not-so-subtle—flirting, and then maybe some foreplay. It’s like assembling a piece of IKEA furniture: there are steps to follow and parts to align. But in a free-use relationship, that assembly manual gets tossed out the window.
How Does a Free-Use Relationship Even Work?
Here’s how it works: If one partner is in the mood, there’s no need for the charade. They can simply express their desire to the other partner. “Horny? Let’s not make a big production out of it,” is the prevailing sentiment.
And it’s not just about the freedom to initiate sex; it’s about the freedom to do so regardless of what the other person is doing. Doing the dishes, watching a movie, or even working from home? In a free-use relationship, the agreement often stipulates that one partner consents to be sexually available at all times, no matter what they’re up to. This eliminates the need for lengthy negotiations or setting the mood; it’s all systems go, as long as the boundaries and rules previously set are respected.
[Read: How to initiate sex and 25 seductive ways to take the lead in bed]
Of course, this doesn’t mean that the “free-to-use” partner becomes an object devoid of will. That’s where the concept of ongoing consent comes into play. It’s a standing agreement but can be paused or stopped at any time, by either party. No questions asked, no hard feelings—well, unless those were part of the agreed-upon terms!
Ground Rules and Boundaries of Free-Use Relationships
Before you venture into the tantalizing world of free-use relationships, it’s vital to lay down some ground rules. We’re not talking about unwritten rules that everyone secretly knows but no one speaks about. Nope, we’re talking about explicit agreements that are as clear as a summer sky.
Here’s a list to get you started:
1. Be S.M.A.R.T.
Be Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound in your agreements. If there are times of the day, week, or month that you don’t want to be free to use, lay that out clearly and as early as possible. It ensures that you’re not just making a vague commitment but defining the exact boundaries, making them easier to follow and respect.
[Read: 23 secrets to set personal boundaries and guide others to respect them]
2. Negotiation process
Borrowing a leaf from BDSM practices, sit down and negotiate the terms. Discuss soft limits, hard limits, and safewords. This is your chance to get into the details, so no topic should be off the table.
3. Ongoing consent
Consent isn’t a one-time ticket. It’s ongoing, and either party should have the freedom to withdraw at any moment. Make this clear from the start, and revisit it regularly to ensure everyone is still comfortable. [Read: BDSM – What it is, 54 sexy tips and tricks, and BDSM ideas to try for the first time]
4. No surprises
While the essence of a free-use relationship is availability, that doesn’t mean surprising your partner with new or unspoken expectations. Discuss situations where initiating is acceptable and where it’s not—like that awkward family dinner at your aunt’s place, for example.
5. Safe words or signals
Sometimes words escape us, so agree on a safeword or even a non-verbal signal that means ‘stop immediately.’ This adds an extra layer of security to your free-use relationship, ensuring that you’re both happy and safe.
6. Time and place
Decide on specific settings where this agreement is valid. Maybe it’s within the four walls of your home or during certain hours of the day. Being explicit about the when and where keeps misunderstandings at bay.
7. Periodic review
Set times in your weekly or monthly schedule to revisit these rules, because hey, we change, and so do our preferences. Make it a point to assess whether the free-use relationship is still meeting both partners’ needs and adjust accordingly. [Read: 36 signs of disrespect in a relationship that reveal a lack of love and respect]
8. Health and wellness
Let’s face it; no one is in the mood when they’re down with the flu. Make it a rule that the free-use relationship takes a backseat when someone is unwell. Trust us, it’s better for both parties in the long run.
9. Respect over desire
The urge might be there, but respect comes first. That means honoring your partner’s wishes even if they go against your desires at the moment. Remember, a free-use relationship is a two-player game; it doesn’t work if one person keeps hogging the joystick.
10. No third-party involvement without consent
Some people enjoy adding an audience or additional participants to their sexual escapades. That’s cool, but it needs to be explicitly discussed and agreed upon. This is not a plot twist you want to spring on someone unannounced. [Read: 21 must-know ways to ask someone for a threesome and join you in bed]
11. No recording or photos without agreement
While capturing the moment might sound enticing, it’s not something to do on a whim in a free-use relationship. Both parties should agree on what is and isn’t okay to record or photograph, and how those recordings will be stored or shared.
12. Mental and emotional check-ins
Just because the physical aspect is front and center doesn’t mean you should neglect the emotional. Periodic mental and emotional check-ins can go a long way in maintaining a healthy and enjoyable free-use relationship.
13. Communication channels
Decide how you’ll communicate, especially in complicated scenarios. Is it a text? A specific look? This may sound trivial, but clear communication is the bedrock of any successful free-use relationship. [Read: 42 secrets to communicate better in a relationship and ways to fix a lack of it]
14. Introduce gradual changes
Spontaneity may be the spice of life, but in a free-use relationship, it’s better to gradually introduce any changes to the agreed-upon rules. Both partners should be comfortable with any new elements.
15. Safe zones
Establish areas or situations that are off-limits for sexual activity. Maybe it’s the car or a public setting. Being explicit about your no-go zones will help avoid uncomfortable situations.
Do’s and Don’ts: The Unspoken Etiquette of Free Use Relationship
So you’ve hashed out the ground rules and you’re ready to take the plunge. But hey, don’t leave your good behavior at the door. Here are some do’s and don’ts to guide your journey into this intriguing relationship style.
1. Do: Be mindful of non-verbal cues
Paying attention to your partner’s body language can offer clues about their comfort level. In a free-use relationship, this is especially important because the framework may not always allow for explicit verbal communication. [Read: 37 secrets to read people by their body language and expressions instantly]
2. Do: Debrief after encounters
Take a few moments post-engagement to discuss what worked and what didn’t. This quick chat serves as a temperature check, ensuring both parties feel respected and fulfilled.
3. Do: Keep an emergency ‘break glass’ plan
While you’ve discussed ongoing consent, always have a contingency plan for when something goes unexpectedly awry. Whether it’s someone changing their mind last minute or someone’s feelings getting hurt by what happens during intimacy, have a plan in mind for how you’re going to repair the damage and emerge with your relationship as strong as ever. It adds an extra layer of security and trust in the relationship.
[Read: 28 heartfelt ways to say you’re sorry and apologize to someone you love]
4. Do: Update on external factors
If either of you is on medication or has an external factor that may affect your sexual relationship, make it known. Transparency is vital, especially when hormones and libidos are in play.
5. Don’t: Assume
If there’s any doubt, ask. Whether it’s a new move or a variation in routine, never assume your partner is comfortable with it without confirmation.
6. Don’t: Neglect aftercare
In a free-use relationship, it can be easy to overlook the importance of aftercare—the emotional and sometimes physical care given after intense sexual encounters. Don’t skimp on this; it’s more essential than you might think. [Read: 26 sexy secrets to be dominant in bed, control your partner, and not hurt them]
7. Don’t: Use it as a cop-out for other responsibilities
Being in this type of relationship doesn’t excuse you from other commitments or emotional availability. Sure, the physical aspect is more straightforward, but that doesn’t mean you can ghost on the emotional side of things. If you think ghosting is a no-go in traditional relationships, it’s a hard stop here too.
8. Don’t: Forget about safe sex
Just because it’s a free-use relationship doesn’t mean you’re free from practicing safe sex. Always make sure to prioritize safety and health for both parties. [Read: 29 safe sex secrets and nasty dangers of unprotected sex most don’t know]
Positive and Negative Impact of Free Use Relationship
While a free-use relationship can be incredibly exciting and liberating, it’s crucial to be mindful of its longer-term impact. After all, what’s the point if it leaves you emotionally drained or psychologically troubled?
1. Enhanced communication skills
The nature of a free-use relationship necessitates a level of open and honest communication that can improve how you interact not just with your partner but also with others.
2. Deepened trust and intimacy
The requirements for ongoing consent and boundary discussions often result in a closer emotional connection, enriching the relationship in multiple dimensions. [Read: How to build trust in a relationship and learn to be loyal and loving]
3. Exploration and self-discovery
The space a free-use relationship provides for sexual and emotional exploration can be a gateway for personal growth and understanding one’s boundaries. Seriously, there is so much that you can learn about yourself when you take conventional ideas of consent and sexual boundaries and flip them on their head!
4. Empowerment
For some, the freedom and ongoing consent in this type of relationship can be empowering, making them feel more in control of their own sexuality. [Read: Sex-positive feminism – what it is and why we must embrace the movement]
5. Enhanced sexual satisfaction
The very nature of a free-use relationship often means more sexual activity, so if you’re in a bit of a dry spell within your relationship, making your relationship a bit more free-use might be just the spark you need to reignite those passions.
6. Reduced sexual inhibition
The agreement between partners often allows for a safe space where both can explore their desires without the cloud of societal judgment.
7. Building resilience
The structure of a free-use relationship can teach partners how to navigate conflict and discomfort, building emotional resilience over time. [Read: Relationship arguments – 38 tips and ways to fight fair and grow closer in love]
8. Lessens the guessing game
Free use relationships eliminate many of the rituals and dances usually associated with initiating sexual activity. Say goodbye to decoding cryptic texts or ambiguous body language; here, consent and intentions are clearly established, cutting through the maze of “Do they want to or not?”
9. Stress reduction
For some people, sexual activity is a proven stress reducer. In a free-use relationship, the more frequent opportunities for sexual activity can serve as an effective way to manage stress.
10. Shared experiences and bonding
Embarking on this unique relationship journey can result in shared experiences that further strengthen the emotional bond between partners.
11. Risk of sub drop
The emotional lows that can follow the highs of D/s activities can be severe if not handled carefully, leading to depressive feelings or irritability. [Read: Domestic discipline – how it works and 29 BDSM rules and tips for beginners]
12. Potential for ‘topspace’ hazards
The euphoric state of dominants can cloud their judgment, affecting their decision-making skills and potentially putting the submissive partner at risk.
13. Emotional drain or burnout
The constant upkeep of boundaries and ongoing consent can lead to emotional fatigue or even relationship burnout.
14. Boundary violations
The constant negotiation and ongoing consent in a free-use relationship could lead to accidental boundary crossings, causing emotional harm. It’s easy to get carried away in the heat of the moment, mistaking a previously agreed-upon limit as something more fluid.
When this happens, not only is the immediate experience tainted, but it can also cast a shadow on the trust and intimacy that you’ve built up with your partner.
15. Jealousy and insecurity
The level of sexual freedom in a free-use relationship could trigger feelings of jealousy or insecurity, harming the relationship’s foundation. While one partner might be totally on board with the concept, seeing or knowing that their partner is engaging in sexual activities without the usual romantic prelude could stir up uncomfortable emotions.
Over time, these feelings could escalate and cause a rift between partners, requiring extra emotional work to mend. [Read: Jealousy in a relationship – how to accept, deal, and overcome it in love]
16. Guilt or shame
Cultural or societal judgments about the nature of a free-use relationship can lead to feelings of guilt or shame. You might find yourself battling internalized stigmas or worrying about how others would perceive your relationship if they found out.
These feelings can cast a dark cloud over what might otherwise be a fulfilling dynamic, hampering the freedom and openness that the relationship is built upon.
17. Risk of co-dependency
The intense emotional and sexual interaction in a free-use relationship could risk creating an unhealthy dependency between partners. Because the dynamic often eliminates the “guessing game” and foreplay, it might become a default coping mechanism for stress, emotional discomfort, or even boredom.
This over-reliance on sexual interaction for emotional equilibrium can gradually morph into co-dependency, jeopardizing the overall health of the relationship. [Read: Enmeshed relationship – 66 enmeshment signs in couples and ways to heal in love]
18. Social stigma
As mentioned earlier, the unconventional nature of a free-use relationship can make it a magnet for social judgment or stigma. The last thing you need is side-eye from your neighbors or hushed conversations at social gatherings.
While what happens between two consenting adults is nobody’s business but their own, the weight of societal disapproval can still affect your emotional well-being and how you view your relationship.
19. Potential for abuse
The dynamic of a free-use relationship could be manipulated into a form of emotional or sexual abuse if not carefully monitored. Because the boundaries in this relationship style are different from more conventional relationships, it may create gray areas where consent becomes murky.
When not vigilantly guarded, this could open the door for manipulative behaviors or power imbalances, making it crucial to continuously communicate and reassess boundaries. [Read: 42 signs and ways to see manipulative behavior and stop being used by people]
20. Financial strain
Investing in accessories or environments that cater to a free-use relationship can become financially taxing over time. For instance, some couples might splurge on high-end sex toys, BDSM furniture, or even book adult-only resorts to create the perfect setting for their kink.
While these purchases can certainly enhance the experience, they can also quickly add up, causing financial strain that could spill over into other areas of the relationship.
Have an Open Conversation With Your Partner if a Free-Use Relationship Interests You
If you find that the idea of a free-use relationship resonates with you, don’t shy away from that curiosity. Instead, take it as an invitation to have an open conversation with your partner. Discuss your boundaries, establish ground rules, and be crystal clear about consent. Remember, any relationship, but especially one as nuanced as a free-use relationship, is a two-way street built on ongoing communication and mutual respect.
And hey, if this is your fetish, go ahead and explore it! The only way you’ll ever know if a free-use relationship is right for you is by taking that plunge—consensually, of course.
